I was, as I’ve mentioned before, diagnosed with chronic depression at age 25 after years of progressively losing more and more of my daily battles with it. I saw a great therapist for 6 months, then returned to Melbourne where I spent a few years jumping through the ‘find a good therapist’ hoops before I landed with my current one, Elke. I’ve spent about 2 year under her care. I’ve been medicated for about 8 months now after spiralling down into a severe low and deciding I didn’t much care to be alive.
It’s been a hard road to walk. I’ve had to face up to some very hard truths in that time. With Elke I was pushed and challenged. Pushed to step outside what I knew. Challenged to remap my world with a new language. It’s been good. I’ve done the work and reaped the benefits. I shed skins few times and came out tougher and wiser for it, I think.
Most importantly I didn’t spack over any cracks. I healed them. No matter how slow, painful and frustrating the healing process was I stuck with it. My depression is pretty effectively gone. My anxiety is within normal realms in most places. I manage stress, conflict, and communication better than I ever have. I am looking forward and making plans!
I’ve really learnt the value of acknowledgement, introspection and release. Acknowledge the issues, examine and resolve them within myself, and then let them go. There’s a lot I’ve come to terms with and am now able to explain better than I could a few years ago. Which is a bit sad as some of it is around issues that I wish I could have made people understand better what was going on at the time. It is what it is though.
I’m beginning to wind up with Elke. Meds will remain in place till mid-2016 to give me time to make sure I am truly functional prior to having to face the world without chemical interference. I’m truly happy at the moment. I’m already looking forward to seeing what the new year will bring for myself and my little family of loved ones and dear friends.